Starting on the journey

We managed to make some decisions about how to proceed with my infertility treatment. I scheduled surgery for December 4th. I feel pretty good about the decision, especially because I think I will feel better if I know what's going on inside me. If my doctor is unable to unblock my tubes, then we will proceed directly to IVF. If he is able to unblock them, I think we will try several cycles of stimulated IUI's before proceeding to IVF. At least, that is the plan in my head. I will be discussing all this with the doctor. Given my age, I can't afford to waste too much time messing around.

On another note, I started acupuncture treatments. I really like my acupuncturist, and she has experience in treating infertility. She will also be formulating some chinese herbs for me. I had my first treatment Thursday, and it was fairly relaxing. I did have some needles dangerously close to my belly button, and that freaks me out. I have an irrational fear that if something goes inside my belly button, it will go straight into my abdomen. Ridiculous, I know. I guess I better get used to needles in the belly if I have to do IVF. I think I am going to do some research on meditation so I can relax more during the treatments and not have my mind going in a million directions thinking and worrying about everything I have to do.

One of the worst things about dealing with infertility is seeing pregnant women everywhere and trying not to feel bitter about it. I don't want to be a bitter person. Trying to work on this....